Angelika's  Family  Constellations  Newsletter  April 2014 

Next workshop
at
Gayatri-Retreat:
April Sat12th-Sun13th

April Sat26th-Sun27th
Would be great if you could stay over. Just bring your bedding!

Next days after these
will be Sept 6th and 7th

For introduction and  earlier issues:
Newsletter archives
To subscribe to this newsletter,

f
or any questions, or to book a constellation 
just email me 

angelika.schenk@gmail.com
Gayatri-Retreat
1033 Cedar Pocket Rd.
Gympie, QLD 4570 Australia 

www.coming-together.com
 
www.family-constellations.org
Dear friends, I just need to talk about one of my pet subjects again. Perhaps it is just a self talk. But really, we have seen over the years that every symptom has a long story to tell.
It is also a pet subject of Bert's. It sits at the heart of the question: War or peace. Bert approaches it from the phenomenological perspective that we use in constellations all the time: without any value judgment, just being there with what is shown to us.

That's a necessary attitude if we are serious about reconciliation. But I feel we can heal a lot if we approach if we approach the subject with the question: How can we heal the trauma it contains?

Meditation
with 

Bert 

Hellinger

When Bert says, his method of phenomenology reveals no taking sides when it comes to conscience. I feel it is because the method itself does not take sides because its task is just that: perceiving only.

Of course this method serves us well, when we, in all honesty, do our constellations, with our hopes for gifts of peace and ease. Family-constellations are in the service of peace. For that reason we need to be well-meaning for all. What is not loved, cannot find its way back to love.

So it is twofold. An enlightened society has ideas of civil peace, of non violent procedures, of human rights for all. Yet those who harmed others are made to face the consequences. (though the mega gangsters walk unhindered, of course.)

Bert says, all religions instill a strict conscience in its members. But the better word would be “subjects”. Well some people would differ here. There are those people who became followers of Jesus, without Roman violence.  These people, like Armenians, and one of the four  Kurdish groups. They remain soft, lick their wounds, bring their dead home whenever they can, and keep on going.

Roman so called Christianity has always been violent, instilling fear in people and setting many examples of what will happen if people don’t tow the line. It’s a Roman invention after all, with a usurped Jesus that is still hanging on the cross, poor saviour. He has to demonstrate to people that they are all bad, that’s why he is still on the cross. roams knew how to instill fear in people, setting plenty of examples about what happens to those who do not tow the Roman line.

He was resurrected from the cross, but the Romans had to deny that. Their worldly power was not enough for them, they wanted to control people’s souls.

So, I can only conclude that what we call conscience is based on fear of repercussion, of exclusion. The more brutal and patriarchal the rulers are, the more fearful the subjects. The more lenient those in power are, the happier the people.

In Thailand I saw the difference. People do not fear Buddha. They love and revere him. He give good, wise advice and education. But even Thailand received the edge of the mogul empire. This is why the people are different to the rulers. So, Thais do not feel their spiritual guide, they fear the worldly power, yet the king meditates with the people every day, via television The king of Thailand tries to set an example to his people and country. But the king has not much worldly power. If the people fear anyone, it would be the worldly power.

Accordingly, Thais have a relatively open conscience, and they are often amazingly mild. Or, will I have to say, were. I count myself lucky to have experienced Thailand 45 years ago, when it came close to my idea of paradise. But they also have corrupt and very stern rulers, and they can overturn a paradise easily. 

On the level of family we have the same variations. Where the parents are not strictly ruled by some patriarchal religion or more worldly rules that are sternly transmitted to the children, the children have a deeply ingrained conscience, which then often goes with fear, and rebellion, and in extreme cases, with violence and suicide.

Take a family that does not have such a burden, children are not exposed to laws, but often to suggestions and advise, and help. Obedience is becoming an obsolete concept. Cooperation and love run many modern families.

Personally I was lucky in my childhood. As a young child I did experience that the four grandparents had somewhat different values, all four presented them to me, without any attempts of coercion.

My maternal  grandmother emphasized learning, which she had not much opportunity for in her youth. She said it would equip me for life. It was easy to follow this. My maternal  grandfather became my hero who though he was already dead. He lived to the highest values I can imagine: saving people whilst constantly being in danger himself. Well, I can only stand in awe. He lived up to: Do to others as you would others like to do also.

My other grandmother emphasized survival skills. She told me quite a few. Through her alertness she survived the war without harming others. I thought 
that was smart, but I did not have it in me to be smart this way.

The paternal grandfather was fairly learned, but did not share as much as I would have loved him to. But I felt his gaze resting on me with pleasure and benevolence. He knew many languages, so I tried as well, at least I did a bit. And he had something that allowed him to accept life as it comes. I thought
that was a good strength to have, even a tool for peace.

The only person that instilled some kind of ‘conscience in me, was my mother’s sister, my beloved aunt. She said one must keep the peace, even if others 
don’t. I thought she was right, but it was hard to not fight back. She was the 
first to tell me that we can think about actions and attitudes instead of just 
having them.

My father was the one who wanted me to toughen up. I was just too shy.  
He practiced daily to get me to defend myself, but I found it too exhausting. Eventually I understood that all these daily squabbles were designed by him 
so I would learn to defend myself. I told him. We were both touched and we could let go of  the war model. We were both very relieved.

My mother just showed me how to be a good mother, who loved her children with much affection and an alert mind, and providing for our needs as best as possible under difficult circumstances. Nobody told me what to think or do or 
not to. It was adult life that presented me with some moral dilemmas. Sometimes I had nobody to share them with. These were mostly work related.
I used to be angry with god, because he allowed wars. There was big rage in me. No it is gone. God hasn’t held my pain against me. Jesus even less so. He has 
been very kind on many occasions. One is allowed to make mistakes, and sometimes there is no option either way.

Bert says, Kant did not understand conscience. This may be a squabble the 
two had a long time ago. Bert also wanted to visit Luther a long time ago, 
even though he was a Catholic clergyman then. Silly Luther did not recognize 
him as a comrade in thoughts. This is all historical, can be found on the net. 
Well, enlightenment came in steps only, and there are many still to take.

Kant was able to formulate a human conscience, applying to all human beings: 
At any time, act as if the guidelines of your will could be applied to a general legislation. The trouble is: How many human beings would be ready for it? 
But it stands as a signpost
, signed by Buddha and Jesus and quite a few 
others whom we cannot but bow to. These are just some thoughts to start the topic. When we look around to see that nearly all cultures find a retaliatory approach necessary, we know we have a long way to go, if we want to go it at all.

I will write about the origin of conscience and the wounds that humans try to avoid with their rules, spoken und unspoken, all 
the way from gently imparted or brutally enforced with threats 
of exclusion and death. Have a lovely time. May your conscience
be wise and mild with you.
www.family-constellations.org 

Obviously, we live in different worlds. These are governed by different  levels of consciousness, one is in the foreground, and another one in the background. In raising children we largely move in the superficial level of consciousness. 

This means, this level is controlled by our good and bad conscience.  More precisely, we could say this world is governed by the god of our conscience.
Before I succeeded in understanding the sources of the good and the bad conscience, the whole occident perceived the voice of conscience 
as a divine voice, 
through which God intervenes
directly  in our lives. 
On the one hand,

this means choosing us for his blessing and eternal life by his side, so this is the promise of eternal bliss by his side, in so-called heaven. 
On the other hand, if we decide against this voice, denying it obedience, we feel guilty, 
our conscience is bad now, 
and we risk being banned eternally,
 in a dreadful hell.
Therefore, many religions refer to this conscience, especially where  they are tied up with human
domination over others. 
The good or bad conscience is the foundation of all these religions. 
Those following their good conscience and adhering to it, will be saved. 
Those acting against it are eternally banned by this God of power.

All these concepts are based on the experience of our good or bad conscience. 
These ideas and the experiences 
that come with it, have dominated the whole occident with the generally accepted doctrine that God speaks to each one of us directly via our good or bad conscience, and as a consequence we must obey the voice of our conscience, 
come hell or high water.

Nobody, not even one amongst the great wise men and mystics, 
were able to eschew the belief in God’s voice in our conscience. 
This also applies to the
 consequences of this conscience 
in the way we were brought up as children and bring up our own.

Finally I exposed myself to the various forms 
of good and bad conscience, 
through a comprehensive philosophical mode 
of insight, over more than six years. 
This method and its application is called: phenomenological.

Angelika's  Family  Constellations  Newsletter  March 2014 

For introduction and  earlier issues:
Newsletter archives
Next workshop
at
Gayatri-Retreat:
March 15th

Would be great if you could stay over. Just bring your bedding!

 

To subscribe to this newsletter,
f
or any questions, 
or to book a constellation 
just email me 

angelika.schenk@gmail.com
Gayatri-Retreat
1033 Cedar Pocket Rd.
Gympie, QLD 4570 Australia 

www.coming-together.com
 
www.family-constellations.org
Dear friends, I just need to talk about one of my pet subjects again. Perhaps it is just a self talk. But really, we have seen over the years that every symptom has a long story to tell.

Meditation
with 

Bert 

Hellinger

 

Bert Hellinger’s task is about spiritual reconciliation. Amongst the many reasons why reconciliation is so important: It plays an essential role in healing psychosis.

Where peace is re-established we can start again, we can make things new.

Constellations revealed a common error. We assume we are ‘individuals’.  We assume that what goes on inside us is ours personally. Each one of us is unique, yes, but how many other individuals make themselves felt, heard, even seen, from inside us, this is a big question. For only in our physical appearance are we individuals, beneath that we are so deeply connected to so many people, and so many traits of theirs are alive in us!

There are the people down our ancestors’ line, but also our incarnations’ line, where each one comes with a crowd of ancestors as well. So how can we tell what is ours personally?  What we find is that we are very complex in our soul. Complex often in a burdened sense, whilst many issues are not reconciled. Many of our “personal” traits settle down, as the people who created them in us are reconciled. We become more and more empty, and free, free to love.

One of Bert Hellinger’s great achievements: His unravelling of the Psychotic puzzle in a way that can actually cure it. It can happen, as usual, through reconciliation.

And even more, the ancient Greeks already knew about the origin of Psychoses. The other people who knew about them were the old women in the villages, in Russia for instance. My explanation of why they understood it, is: “They saw the beginnings of it.” Where people live in peaceful harmony there is no need for psychosis, for there are no dark secrets. So psychosis shows us what we need to do in our normal life also. 

This is a field that has a big part of my interest, as in psychosis we can see the issues very clearly: the key lies in healing the past. Memories of traumatic events may fade into silence, or as they did in the past, into fairytales, folklore songs, and myths that can hardly be deciphered. But the memories are also kept alive in the distorted recall of some people, who are then called psychotic,  and also in a range of symptoms in many family members. These people hold the key to so much in our soul.

Intensely psychotic people are at the extreme end of the line. They can be possessed to a degree where they are unable to relate to their environment. Other people cannot understand what is going on inside them, and they themselves can’t understand it either. Too much is going on at once. It can be very terrifying. At times they have very little of a shared world with other human beings, even less than it seems. If psychotic  people are not understood and helped to regain clarity, they and their families suffer greatly, but if they are helped, their healing brings healing to many others also. Many souls can then benefit from the healing of the event about which they have had some subconscious knowledge. This can have reached them through voices, visions, even smells and distorted sensations and unusual physical complaints.

The Greek word Psychosis, and the old /Greek tragedies give it away. Psych- means soul again, and – osis means more of, even too much. So the person who expresses psychotic behaviour is augmented by at least one other soul. This invading soul is nearly always dead, and has no one to tell the horrible secret that they must bear.

The horrifying thing about it is that the psych-otic person can be so deeply under the spell of the invading dead person, and even persons, that they may feel forced to act out what the voice tells them to do. A deeply psychotic person may be in an episode where they can barely perceive any outer reality. There may  be the voice of a murderer who feels guilty and is unable to find a way to peace, and this ‘voice’ may tell its host, to go and jump from a bridge, or to commit suicide in some other way. Or the dead person is very angry with a murderer and wants to kill him or her. This may also lead to murder. Prisons are full of such murderers, and only recently is there a beginning of an acknowledgment of this fact, at least in Australia. Someone may express total despair. The best that psychotic murderers can hope for is to be put on drugs that numb them so much that they are rendered unable to harm others. It is also known that murders and accidents happen again in places where they occurred earlier on. This is something like a place-bound psychosis that can overwhelm people who are vulnerable to these impressions. Often the symptoms are quite clear. What these psychotic people say, at least in the beginning, points to the tragic event.

Milder Psychosis can occur when something happened that was not actually murder, but perhaps someone was accused of having caused the death of another person. When someone comes to me because of a psychotic relative, my first question is: What was the first unusual behaviour, the first strange statements this person made, the first talk about a voice.

A person in severe psychosis has been drawn into a connection with a covered- up murder, or something similarly frightening. In outright psychosis we have the dead present in a living person, even quite violently. And in the milder direction we can broaden the topic even much wider than that: Most people carry painful memories of people who died a long time ago. In fact, we have no symptoms without real events. Symptoms are the reminders of painful events. Symptoms may be deceivingly harmless. 

Being diagnosed as psychotic, or as I heard it often from “diagnosed “ people, who introduced themselves to me: ‘I am a paranoid schizophrenic.’ This is a severe verdict. This person is seen as dangerous, and they can be. I think it is important not to diagnose psychosis versus not psychosis, but rather as a  continuum of severe to very mild. We call it psychotic when the communication is barely intelligible and threatening, and the poor recipient suffers from massive confusion, all the way to mixing up family members with some other, dangerous people who need to be fought or killed. The only way we can really help the psychotic person is to befriend the souls of the people who were involved in the traumatic, murderous event in the past.

Psychotic means, these people are invaded by disincarnated souls.

The actual, living person is hearing voices, seeing things, and is tormented in many ways, so that they cannot find their sense of identity whilst they are invaded. It is all the more terrifying as nobody wants to hear what they hear inside. Well, it is frightening and confusing to others as well. Some religious people then want the “bad” spirits to be cast out of the invaded person. This is the less helpful version, as the restless soul will go elsewhere.

This invasion is comparable to what happens when a person is tormented badly by other people who are as alive as they are themselves.  

The human capacity that lets some people hear and feel very distressed, confused, even violent souls,  is the same capacity as the one that allows us to communicate with our ancestors.

What we call psychosis is that which deals with dreaded events, with dark secrets, with the victims and perpetrators involved in it. Here, some people are witnessing on an inner level what is still in turmoil. The murderers are not yet regretting what they did, the victims are still frightened and perhaps want to take revenge, and to bring the secret to the attention of the living, the perpetrators want to prevent that by any means. So, where we have psychosis, one individual has to bear and witness this turmoil, and even to act out both side literally simultaneously. What a dreadful strain, most of all on the psychotic person, but also on their family and other environments.

Standard western  psychiatry tires of relating to the poor recipient of this turmoil, and resorts to chemical tranquillisers. Not being heard adds another dimension of terror to the psychotic person. It is called paranoia. This means not having a single soul on earth that you can really trust. This is hell on earth.

It is not a sign of worry at all if our ancestors, especially near and dear ones, talk to us, and we listen, and respond. But many people have a deep fear of any capacity to communicate with the dead because they are afraid of being haunted themselves, by very unhappy souls, so that they may end up psychotic, too. But there is not much we can do to prevent the contact, other than heavy use of chemicals. Instead, we can talk to them kindly, we can tell them we see their distress. We can calm them down.

I know enough Chinese and Russian people who find this friendly exchange with the dead quite normal, and so it is. In fact, it is wonderful to be in harmonious communication with our people, here or over there. And this capacity seems to be coming out in the open more, so it can be refined and become helpful. Well, it is one of the cornerstones of family-constellations, and here we have a very protected space in which everybody involved can be heard and seen, acknowledged as a human being with a special fate.

A friend brought a young lady to me to look at her symptoms. She was very frightened, and one never knew what could trigger her into a panic attack. The family background did not reveal anything. I asked what had happened in the family. Then the friend mentioned that she had had a severe car accident, and after that she had these symptoms. When I inquired further, I heard that the ordinary medical coma specialists, no psychiatrists at all, had found that the patients often returned to consciousness with a “personality change”, and sometimes with “psychosis.” That was their observation. A human being in coma is very vulnerable to being invaded by unhappy souls. The traumatized, unconscious brain has no defences. I know a few people who have a similar problem.  

Another form of a mild and only temporary exchange with a dead person is perhaps also what quite a few Chinese people have experienced. I have been told about older women who make themselves heard quite forcefully. Perhaps quite often very tenaciously, so that the person into whose ears they scream, gets very distressed and feels truly haunted. I had a taste of that in Kuala Lumpur when someone finally brought a lady to me who was acutely suffering from this kind of distress.

Well, we sat down together in a big comfortable armchair, and I asked the lady about this woman who was so angry in this poor lady’s head. It became clear it was a very upset grandmother who had not had anyone to listen to her story. So she presented her complaints in a rather forceful way that terrorised the granddaughter. Gradually, step by step, we befriended and calmed the grandmother down by making her feel that we were listening to her, and that she was welcome to tell her painful story, but please, more gently. In the end grandmother and granddaughter were lovingly reconciled. Well I hope they have good communication from hereon. This was not exactly Bert’s way, but rather nearing Marshall Rosenberg’s compassionate communication style, but it is still based on Bert’s insights. In a workshop we could have done this as a constellation, but the lovely big armchair naturally provided the closeness that calmed both grandmother and granddaughter.  

Constellations operate on the soul level, under the guidance of spirit. In a constellation we are all a bit like puppets, available to what wants to be shown through us. No thinking. But awareness of what is at the moment. We can feel when we move because a movement takes us along. Then we follow.

A soul has distinct qualities. A soul is some subtle sphere that is more or less conscious of itself. The soul is part of evolution. The quality of consciousness can vary greatly. A soul can be injured, but also healed. A soul may be fairly unconscious or quite alert. A soul may be paralysed or lively. A soul can go through the range of states that we as humans go through. A soul stores memory, happy ones and also trauma. Therefore it is quite possible to represent a soul. The soul of a family knows what is in need of reconciling, and it will take us there.

China has understood that we are deeply connected to our ancestors, something that receives far less attention in western countries, except with minorities that feel threatened.

And us in the West, here we already have a problem with our concept of the individual. How do we know that the problem for which an individual seeks help, is that individual’s problem? Why does this person not change? The individual may just bear the symptoms of some painful event in the past.

What is healing? Healing means to make whole. It is deep, un-reconciled wounding that took away our wholeness.  Every healing deals with a conflict. One heals a conflict through reconciliation. We become whole when the people who belong to us feel whole together with us. That this is so, we can see because when the reconciliation has happened, we do not need to revert to the unhealed state, for we have understood something on a very deep level, there where love is restored.

On the level of psychotherapy, there are some essential insights that differ from all other approaches.

Psychotherapy may even go as far as finding causes. Every traumatic event consists of at least two players: The one who caused the suffering, and one who suffers. Yet the analytic part is usually seen as the cure. It goes like this: “Now you know what it is all about. Now you can put it in the past.”

Well, knowing is a useful step on the way, but the real healing happens through reconciliation. Are the ancestors willing to regret what they have done, to forgive each other, to find peace with each other? Most of the time they have been longing for this, deep down.

Much of western psychotherapy looks at disturbances, unwanted behaviour, etc in the person, as that which needs to be cured. The person with the symptoms, which are considered the illness, is called psychotic, if the symptoms are strong. The medical profession, and indeed everyone else, want psychotic people not to hear voices, let alone express them. The intention is usually to get rid of unwanted symptoms, with a wide variety of methods. This is tedious work and usually it does not bring lasting results. When a person does not exhibit symptoms, people are relieved and call it remission.
Family-constellations have revealed this as an error, because the psychological disturbances are symptoms which are expressed through the symptom bearer. This rarely brings the desired result.

The real causes cannot be seen in the symptom bearer, but in the symptoms. They can only be seen in those who experienced the actual events, traumatic occurrences. These are the souls that are represented in the constellations.

I have not yet seen a symptom that did not have a story to tell and a longing for healing.

Healing really means, making whole, bringing together what needs to be together.

The symptom bearing is particularly painful to witness in those who are called “mentally ill”.

Most of us are a little bit “disturbed” in some sense, as we all bear symptoms of real life events. In most cases, we may not even be aware of it.

Now this can come from different sources. It can be a past life of our own that makes itself felt in this life, or else it can be in some ancestor line of ours. Depending on the severity of the events, this can go back even 1000 years and more, especially at places where much bloodshed occurred. Sometimes these events are still told, in the form of a fairy tale.

Finding out about the real events can be very relieving for the symptom bearer, but the real healing happens when the conflicting parties are reconciled. 

Psychotherapy in its real form is a response to trauma. Each symptom tells a story and is calling out for help, for the parties involved to be deeply reconciled.

In the end all reconciliation is a reconciliation with fate, or with spirit.

Bert’s insights clearly lead us to the understanding that there is not just the individual soul. Families also share a soul, and they are even members of different soul groups. So we clearly also have a family soul. Bert often draws a ring around three generations, but often it also goes much further, depending on the severity.

And countries also have a soul, but this is another topic.

Now how does Bert do this work? In the spirit of Wu Wei, of emptying ourselves of what goes on in ourselves. We let go of all intentions. We are just the puppets on the strings that are held by wise hands. We become pervious. We hand over to greater powers. It is really quite simple. We offer ourselves up to feel the feelings of another human being, and to allow the feelings being transformed, through all the needed steps. First the presentation of the traumatic event, and then gradually, the healing.

Magically, Bert’s process allows this quite easily. The deeper our surrender to not-knowing goes, the deeper we can go with the constellation process. Not knowing leads us to deeper knowing. We are offering ourselves to a process of  transformation. An individual representative opens up to one other soul, but also to a greater soul that can work through this person. We have learned to surrender in trust and openness. In a group of experienced representatives and with a constellation practitioner who is comfortable with the magic silence, the process of reconciliation occurs as if on its own. It is a spiritual  practice in which all participants benefit greatly. Every representative gains much from experiencing what it feels like to be the person they represent. True empathy happens that wipes away differences and prejudices. 

This is another bit of the magic: The actual persons who are represented, but not physically present, will perceive what is going on, no matter where on the planet they are.

It is a wonderful thing to help individuals and families, but how much more wonderful will it be, when we follow the dream that we can gradually expand this spirit of reconciliation into larger communities.

This is the beginning of a new era where we can start again, in a spirit of brotherhood.

Wars used to go together with very strict rules which often become internalised, even by many. This creates a very a harsh conscience that one must obey, for fear of death. To compensate for this fear, one can suppress it and develop a taste for power. This is how it is perpetuated.

 

www.family-constellations.org      angelika.schenk@gmail.com     

 

Angelika's  Family  Constellations  Newsletter  FEBRUARY 2014 

For introduction and  earlier issues:
Newsletter archives
Next workshop
at
Gayatri-Retreat:
Feb17th

Would be great if you could stay over. Just bring your bedding!

 

To subscribe to this newsletter,
f
or any questions, 
or to book a constellation 
just email me 

angelika.schenk@gmail.com
Gayatri-Retreat
1033 Cedar Pocket Rd.
Gympie, QLD 4570 Australia 

www.coming-together.com
 
www.family-constellations.org

 

Dear friends, We are very busy with symptom work at the moment. Everyone has them, and they contain the unhealed fates of earlier generations. History unfolds before our very eyes. The seekers recognize the relatives to whom the story belongs.

 

Meditation
with 

Bert 

Hellinger

 
Symptoms may look small, even trivial. they can be strange little gestures, something that irritates us a little, too small to even mention, and yet all of a sudden they burst out with immense urgency. I have not yet seen a symptom that remained trivial once we turned to it. Participants suddenly know who the people are who have a need to be seen or heard. Someone heard a heavy sentence, spoken by a man the man before the  constellation : No children ever again! What unfolded was world war two, in north east Europe, and it ended badly for a family. The father survived, but he had not been able to save his children from the ferocious fire that burnt down their home town. The participants felt it as very real, and everyone felt for that family and all the other people who had the fires of war raging through their homeland, their towns. We took them into our hearts and wished them a peaceful next life.

Angelika's  Family  Constellations  Newsletter  January 2014 

For introduction and  earlier issues:
Newsletter archives
Next workshop
at
Gayatri-Retreat:
January date to be set

Would be great if you could stay over. Just bring your bedding!

 

To subscribe to this newsletter,
f
or any questions, 
or to book a constellation 
just email me 

angelika.schenk@gmail.com
Gayatri-Retreat
1033 Cedar Pocket Rd.
Gympie, QLD 4570 Australia 

www.coming-together.com
 
www.family-constellations.org
 

Meditation
with 

Bert 

Hellinger

 

 

New paths and infinite time - Bert Hellinger

The first question is: Where do family constellations stand? Family constellations began as a method of psychotherapy. Therefore many family constellation practitioners saw themselves as therapists. Many clients sought out constellations in order to receive help in dealing with certain problems in much the same way that other psychotherapeutic methods offer relief and healing and have helped many people that way.
In the meantime we have been experiencing a transformation of consciousness. Family constellations have played a crucial role in preparing for this change.
From the beginning, practitioners and clients were faced with the phenomena that participants in constellations were taken over by forces outside common understanding and were led into a service that went far beyond the usual relationship between helper and client. Beyond which relationship? Here the helper, there the needy person.
In family constellations light was cast on hidden connections that moved us beyond the ideas of personal distress and help. Suddenly the focus shifted from the client alone. At the same time help came from elsewhere. This guidance relegated the helper into the background. The helper then also became a client who needed assistance from outside and also received it.
The practitioners were similarly taken into possession by other powers, and they were on the same level as the clients who sought their help. The helpers also depended on the same creative movements. They were at their mercy in the same way.
In the practitioners and in the rest of the participants another consciousness came through, far beyond the relationships of I and You. The I that wanted something was taken along by an Us in which it ended as an I in the usual sense, including any prior ideas of good and bad, of better and worse, even of healthy and sick.
These 'Us' constellations enthralled everybody present. Everyone was drawn into the constellation in an individual way. All were disciplined by them and reminded about their personal responsibility for their own actions and the resulting consequences.
The duality in our relationships, of helper and client, of knowledgeable and ignorant, was swept away by an all-embracing Us. Everyone was able to, and had to, fit into a greater whole, with a sense of self-responsibility intact. This was also true across the dimensions of our own health and illness and our happiness or misery.
In family constellations it was revealed that everyone is always present with several other people. Everyone lives different lives and in several places. Everyone is simultaneously taken into service for many others.

By whom? By an all-embracing movement that decides over our welfare in a comprehensive way.

Can anyone come between us and this movement? Are we not all taken in by the same creative power and guided on the path that serves our fate as it had been decreed for us?
This present time is also just one among many that we must live in and live through in order to become whole, increasingly freed and purified by these powers.
Where do these new family constellations lead us? Without a need for intermediate steps they lead us into oneness with our source, at one with its movement, wherever it may take us along.
What are we learning when we commit to family constellations? We learn to agree to ourselves ‒ to become ourselves ‒ as we are. How? Together with all others, different and yet right, together with them at our destination. 

What does this mean for the mode of proceeding in family constellations?

The practitioners leave the level of I and You. They agree to be taken into the service of another consciousness. They resist the offers and demands of clients to submit to their ideas about where family constellations should go, as if that were in their hands. In this way practitioners stay with the level of consciousness that reveals itself in family constellations, rather than reverting to the level of I and You.
Therefore, 'training' in family constellations as you would train for any other profession overlooks the essential aspect of family constellations: the openness to being taken along by the spiritual movements that guide the practitioners and everyone else into another consciousness, taking them into service, rather than the reverse. 
How do we learn this way of family constellations?
We learn it through our own experiences and personal spiritual growth.
How do these family constellations present themselves on the outer level? The participants of a course in family constellations, even in a very large group, are all taken into the same movement together, including the leader of the constellation. This means, the leader steps back as soon as this movement begins. We let these movements take us along, courageously and humbly. The leader is led by the constellation instead of trying to lead it 
Into what kind of consciousness the family constellations will lead we do not know, but we have learnt to trust them, and we will follow them, each one of us as far as we feel comfortable and inspired to do so.

How does the new consciousness reveal itself?

The new consciousness leads to an inclusive love. It leads us to a creative love in which the boundaries between I and You come to an end, and even the boundaries between creator and creature, so the boundaries between the power from which everything has its being, and that which this power called into being. Through this consciousness we are guided in every way into an accord with this creative power, into unison with our source.                                    
The question is: Can there be such a union for us? Can the separation from our source ever be done away with? Or was it never there, for it never began?
What becomes of us when we experience ourselves taken along into this oneness? What if we become aware of it? Do we become aware of ourselves in an all-embracing way? Are we still here individually? Are we only here as a cosmic, infinite We? Do the experiences we have in family constellations take us into this consciousness – into this oneness and love?
Then what remains for us? Everything remains for us, including time, infinite time.

www.family-constellations.org      angelika.schenk@gmail.com     

Angelika's  Family  Constellations  Newsletter  December 2013 

For introduction and  earlier issues:
Newsletter archives
Next workshop
at
Gayatri-Retreat:
7th +8th December
Would be great if you could stay over. Just bring your bedding!

Tanja suggested a bit of a pre- Christmas party! Let me know!

To subscribe to this newsletter,
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or any questions, 
or to book a constellation 
just email me 

angelika.schenk@gmail.com
Gayatri-Retreat
1033 Cedar Pocket Rd.
Gympie, QLD 4570 Australia 

www.coming-together.com
 
www.family-constellations.org
Dear all, I had other plans for this day, but too much reminded me of an event 50 years ago where a great man was killed. He had brought calm to the cold war, the offer of brotherhood among nations, of transparency in the place of secrecy, a natural openness, as if people could behave like a large, caring family. Such language does not happen in our days, perhaps because such thoughts are rare in high ranking politicians at the moment.

Thank you, much loved Jack, we await the return of people like you. What kind of task will fate give you then? If I am around, I will know you by the memory in my heart. Here's a speech of yours, a speech that too many people were not ready for, and still aren't. But thank you for being a forerunner. Your sacrifice will bear fruit when the world has matured.      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29NIlZxSsSs

Meditation
with 

Bert 

Hellinger

 

 

Psychology that helps people 

Souls connected within larger souls

The institute of post- modern psychology in Beijing has set itself  the task of really helping  people, in efficient ways.

This is best achieved on the base of an understanding of the human soul and of any soul, for that matter. Soul is the informing entity that holds something together. Soul exists wherever there is life, and we could extend it even further, as Chinese Tao practices indicate, for instance.

The great Chinese medical traditions have understood the interdependence between parts of a whole.

The term “Individual” can be understood in a misleading way. How are we an individual? I feel, each one of us is, and each being is, an individual, in the sense of being a unique centre of strands of energy, like a town sits at the centre of roads passing through it. And because it exists, even more roads and more travellers come and perhaps even stay for a while. Some places remain idyllic little villages, others grow into big places.

China’s most successful medical export to the world is acupuncture. Acupuncture restores the health of the body - our body also has its own soul - by balancing the energy flow between the organs – our organs also have their own soul - and much, much more. So while each organ is a system itself, it relies on the cooperation with all other organs. Each organ suffers when the connection to another organ is not flowing optimally. The human being also suffers.

So every life form has its inner systems and its outer connections to the systems on the same level and to larger ones. Depending on the healthy flow of all, the systems within are doing well.

So this is also the case with us humans. The soul we mostly refer to is our own, the soul that holds us together as individuals, and contains our feelings, thinking, memory, hopes, dreams, pains. But we do not really see how much of what we think is “me” and “mine”, is really much more an “ours”, something that we share with others in our family. if we want to be our full potential, we need to include all the people who belong to us, and that is our family above all. Once those connections flow well, nurturing for all, we can expand on this steady ground, we can plant trees on it and build homes.

Psychosomatic illnesses make us physically unwell, this means our body suffers when our feelings are not happy and healthy. And this is the case to a large extent when our human connections are not happy, mutually supportive, and seen in their importance.

Psychology has not given enough emphasis on the importance of our human connections. We used to think we can choose with whom we relate, whom we accept, or reject. We liked to think that our little arbitrary will is an acceptable mode of operating. We do have free will, don’t we? Well, for a little while, in small matters, The bill for rejections of people who belong to us comes in when least expected.

But thanks to Bert Hellinger we now have a very efficient way of remedying this shortcoming. Even the people who want to believe that they are fine, even though they do not talk to their parents, show strain elsewhere. They resort to many other therapies and pills and drops and exercises, and they have to keep them up to function well in their daily life. So a lot of maintenance work goes into their life.

If the relationships are badly strained, a large part of their life is taken up by maintenance, and often the methods they employ cannot help much. The soul will not have a substitute for the real thing. The soul insists the real thing needs to happen: restore belonging. Our human individual soul requires the love of our family, the friendliness with our neighbours, the caring cooperation with our colleagues, and even the larger care and concern for our country and our earth.

So our human soul can only do well, where it feels embedded in larger soul units.

The  psychological help we want to give needs to take this into consideration. The first step is of course to heal rifts with our parents and siblings and other close relatives. Family constellations make this so easy. If a family member is excluded, our own soul will also suffer, because our family soul suffers.

We have many excuses of not dealing with these issues. Some deep resentment cannot find the courage to come into the light. Usually it is a fear of further rejection, mutually, or a sense of righteousness that someone deserves to be excluded, but in any case, we are hurting our own soul in this way. Our inner loyalty sometimes demands the expression of excluding someone, even for life. The beautiful thing is, that we become happy when we  have found peace with those we never wanted to forgive whatever we find so unacceptable. But when we give someone else a life sentence, we also give it to ourselves. But when we finally muster up the courage to open our hearts a little bit, hope comes easily, as the souls are always willing. They know they can only flourish as a larger unit. The greater our sense of belonging can extend, the wider our sense of life and love, of belonging and freedom in one.

As it grows we need not spend so much maintenance our ourselves. The more it grows, we recover our real life, our loving creativity, our joy of contributing to something worthwhile, together with others, our part in creating new human  structures of inspiration for ourselves and others. 

There is a way that you will enjoy once you tried it out, with a little bit of willingness. Choose an issue that will not be too difficult, to begin with. But anyway, you won’t have to do anything, you will just be watching. And soon you will feel the benefit.

www.family-constellations.org      angelika.schenk@gmail.com