Here I want to write about the work what comes to my mind, some of it I have transferred to the page
"Taming" I have put on my Gayatri homepage.

about Bert Hellinger
moving with the love of god
moving with spirit
aboriginal australia
family questions
bewegungen der seele
inner exercises
key topics
kindred souls

  index, family questions, inner exercises, movements of the soul, reconciliation, and topics  
express Bert's work as faithfully as I can understand it.

Taming, for me, is an image for what the work helps us to do with ourselves. So we, in line with our souls, bend lovingly over our "wild" parts with understanding and gentle guidance. Pouring love into those aspects of ourselves that function like instinct, unable, unwilling to take guidance.
So, in this, we lovingly offer the best in us to those parts that lag behind. And yet, this can be a very tough part of the process.

Healing the "interrupted movement" towards- especially the mother, may be mentioned here.
Surrender, so to speak, is to the other direction. Here we bend down, head facing heart, acknowldging our not knowing. We develop the humility that we as little humans can only see a tiny part of the picture. We offer all of ourselves to the great soul, for adjusting to the larger picture, the greater love. 
And gradually the trust grows that we are in greater hands, and we can let go of those burdens which are too great for us to carry.
Renunciation has yet another quality to it. It is a deeper challenge still. It is the deepest silencing of our concepts about life and about ourselves, and about Divinity.To be comfortable with personal none existence and with the absence of a world that we need to change.The silence becomes so pure that we are beginning to sense oneness, and allowing emptiness of self, no-thing-ness. 

It could shed extra light on our struggles to explore the anthropological background of it all a bit more. In a way I find it comforting that the entanglements that come to light in these constellations, appear to be related to ancient patterns of humanity. 

Some of these entanglements might even be as old as humanity itself, and older than that. 
No wonder we struggle. But we live in a time where much is permitted to come to light. With that, we have a chance to bring ourselves, gently, lovingly, cautiously, a little more up to date with the soul, growing in trust.
The ancient fears of young humanity still live in our collective unconscious, in our morals, our customs. Defence mechanism were developed, to have a sense of a little bit of control, bargaining with the forces to whom power was attributed. We still share with them so much more than what we care to admit. 

If we could learn to share our fears, grieves, helplessness, in a communal process of dignity, we could perhaps move closer towards a shared love for a shared planet. If we came to make acceptance of "What is", an acknowledged part of our culture, we might have a better chance of influencing "What is" through peace.

"Glorious ancestors", from Basel Museum

At the same time, tribal cultures still have a deep grasp of much that is needed for healing.

In March, SBS showed a superb film about Bougainville, called "Breaking Bows and Arrows".
You could witness a deeply moving ancient reconciliation ceremony, the transformation it brought to the people who were estranged over the murder of a chief during the civil war. The old people said at the end: " The young knew how to make war. But when it was time for reconciliation, they did not know what to do. So now they can respect our old customs again."

The courage for emotional disarmament could, one day, become a fundamental aspect of a human culture. It is a growth process that we are all involved in. Much of what is required for peace on the planet is still not instinct- based, but more in the nature of a dream from the heart. We are learning so much now about we way we feel, think, act. Being truly human is still a fragile condition. Too much trauma, and something in us gives way, and we become less of ourselves.
Cultivating our truly human potential - which lies in our hearts - takes our very best effort and our deepest understanding. 
I takes the presence of the soul, the connectedness to the soul - our personal soul, the family soul, and the soul of humanity. and the one beyond it. Only in this field is it possible for us to come through utter pain and conflict with all our human faculties intact or willing to be whole again. The child needs to know that mother is always there, no matter what. And all of us, we need to sense that the greater love is always there, no matter what. It is there, and we can remain connected to it, be held and reassured by it. We can stay open to the world with that sense of belonging to love, and hold the balance between the pain and the love that holds us.

Disorder in the family
Doing constellations with people whose life we know quite well, it becomes so apparent:
What is perceived as a personal dis-order or a family-disorder ( as a psychological description) is the result of disarray in the natural orders of love. When a mother died in childbirth, the natural order is most painfully disrupted in many ways. If this remains unhealed, even 3 or 4 generations further the effect of "dis-order" is felt. Family members may be described as "dysfunctional". Seeing a family in a constellation that had to cope with this pain, it is so clear how those "dysfunctions" developed. We see how through lack of understanding of the real causes the family members involved struggle with problems that may be seen as "difficult personalities" or "dysfunctional characters". 
In the healing process it is deeply touching to see, how the grandmother who lost her mother cannot mother her child fully, and so it goes, down the line. With great-grandmother back in the family, with the loving presence of the soul that cares for all, beautiful healing takes place, down the family tree, the natural order of things reestablishes itself on the soul level, and outer "dysfunctions" can give way to trust and confidence once more.

In some families, there are , for example, issues of "controlling" behaviour. constellations show who in the family had a real need for control, due to tragedy.

"Coldness" in families is another attribute that goes misunderstood and can cause deep rifts. Behind coldness lies much pain that has never been able to surface. A family member may carry so much pain that they have to freeze, rather than disintegrate or die. This can , at the same time,  be an attempt not to burden the others. Some pain is too big to face on one's own, and it is only when family members can get together, put aside blame, and face the sadness together, that the pain can be shared and healed, and with this, the frozen state, called coldness, can melt.
A "cold" person may carry guilt, even in situations where they believed they did the best they could. Hanging on to the belief may also help them not feeling the full pain. So, they cannot be "warm" even with their family. The family may reject them further for it. So, the cold person needs extra warmth to melt, that is logical, even in physics, is it not? For a person who sees her/ himself as warm, who says to someone, you are cold, is this an expression of warmth? But then, this person is also caught, may be in the same pain, just from a slightly different angle.